Sun, 10/11/2009 - 14:58 — frogdropping

HubPages

Hot damn but the forum's a shit slinging, butt kicking, mud pit-getting place to be.

But I'm alright jack - I'm wearing a latex body suit and respiration gear. I've swam through more shit and crap than you'd find down the sewers so you know, I'm full up on my anti-crap shots. I'm immune ...

Still I can't but help but feel a little sympathy for those that either:

• lack immunity
• lack understanding
• lack feeling

I honestly wish someone would give me a naughty stick. I'd walk the dark and dreary graveyard shift and insert words on the more down and dirty posts. Things like 'lighten up', 'get real' and 'get a grip' would suddenly appear in large red letters. yes - I think that would do nicely.

And while I'm in the mood for spreading some hubcynics - will the arsehole that keeps posting spammy comments on here please pissoff. Half of the m don't make sense, you never include a link. What's the point? And pardon me for pointing this out but spamming is real low - and if you can't even get that right, you're seriously lacking in the SEO dept. I'd honestly think about another career. Like becoming a condom tester for e.g.

I Me Myself

I need to ask my website angel to help me out. I need another page, at the top, whereby I can pop money making stuff. I'm forever being emailed by folks and whilst I have no problem helping anyone, perhaps it would be easier if I just gathered together the most FAQ's about HubPages that I get into my inbox.

Recipe

Time for a new one ...

This is a great one. Truly.

Do It Yourself Espresso

You will need:

• instant (strong) coffee
• sugar
• boiling water
• small cup
• teaspoon

Method:

Boil water. Add sugar and coffee to a small cup - teacup size is best. Add a tiny amount of cold water - maybe a half teaspoon. Beat the sugar, coffee, water - until they become a light brown paste. This is the secret - it needs to be a paste. Add boiling water - voila ... you should have a lovely cup of home-made espreso, complete with creamy top.

Mmmmmmm ....

And changing the topic ... I'm going to the UK in a couple of weeks, for about a month. 4 weeks of being surrounded by the English. I feel that I should insert some happy words here. All I can think of is ... eek.

I've almost forgotten what being British means. I spend large amounts of time alone, have no friends here and rarely have conversations in English, other than those I have with my partner. It's rained about 3 times since I last went to the UK, so I'm definitely not in the usual moaning about the weather mood.

But looking on the brightside, Halloween is just around the corner. I'm intending to play out. Dressed up too. I'm thinking the full works. Face paints, costume and vodka.

Funny story - I sat and watched a Portuguese woman attempting to park her car the other day. On a corner. Now it was clear from the off that she didn't understand the rudiments of physics and the general workings of reversing. But I had just about the best 15 minutes of my life, sat at my café. watching her reverse park on a corner. One of the best laughs too.

The funny thing was, those surrounding me at the café were Portuguese and they always mind their own business. But I'm not Portuguese so I openly stared and laughed. I had a great time. She didn't. Neither did the lower front skirt of her car. She was pretty pissed.

I wish I could share the sight - it was truly glorious.

 

 

 

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